For your post-memorial day pleasure ...

Here are some post-Memorial day links to help you recover from about two pounds of burgers and dogs and about another five of beer.

Unfortunately, I will not be able to update the site again until Thursday, as I will be packing my worldly possessions tomorrow and moving to Greenpoint, Brooklyn on Wednesday.

Take care, and enjoy,

John

VIDEO: Lou Reed, John Cale, and Nico perform “Femme Fatale” in 1972. You Tube (thanks, Kingblind)

BLOG: John Kricfalusi, creator of “Ren & Stimpy” has some great ideas for a new cartoon. Some GREAT ideas. all kinds of stuff

BLOG: If they don’t laugh, then it’s not funny. Simple as that. Overheard in New York

AUDIO: For those times when you need to hear the theme to “Sanford & Son” followed by that to “Fraggle Rock”. stumpnet.net (thanks, I guess i’m floating)

VIDEO: Flaming Lips singer/guitarist Wayne Coyne’s advice to his high school alma mater is classic Wayne. You see, because “technically,” according to Wayne, he’s not a high school graduate. Oh, and maybe some people might think that talking about your days as a dope dealer isn't what the Class of 2006 needs to hear. You Tube, Part 1 You Tube, Part 2 (thanks, Stereogum)

Brooklyn Lager, stupidity, and a T-shirt idea

BLOG: Just because it’s locally brewed, doesn’t mean it won’t taste like shit. Bushwick is Beautiful

BLOG: Meet the dumbest person in the world. Overheard in New York

BLOG: A good idea for a T-shirt is just a good idea, plain and simple. the blues and then some

Cheech & Chong, Carl Monday, and gay ass emo bands

VIDEO: Allow Cheech & Chong to tell you something of the character of Mexican-Americans. You Tube

VIDEO: If you live in Cleveland and can’t help whacking it at the local library, just remember: Carl Monday of NBC 3 will find you. And he won’t leave you, either, until he’s met your parents.Break.com

BLOG: If you must be in a gay ass emo band, there’s only one thing you can do to stand out from the pack. Girls are Pretty

Don Hertzfeldt, sex show, saleswomen pt 1, saleswomen pt 2

VIDEO: Don Hertzfeldt: Genius or sick bastard, but funny either way. A(n albeit long) classic. Google Video

BLOG: Sex Show, one dollar. Kids under 5 feet get in for free. Welcome to the Nut House

BLOG: The way the saleswomen get you, ladies, is when you’re bottomless and your bunky is just hanging out for anyone to see. Anonymous Midwest Girl

BLOG: Actually, they can get to you when you are nearly topless, too. The Company Bitch

Crispin Glover, more Crispin Glover, and hangman

VIDEO: On July 28, 1987, actor Crispin Glover (“Back to the Future”, “Charlie’s Angels”) appeared on Late Night with David Letterman. It was an appearance that would not be forgotten. You Tube

VIDEO: And just in case you haven’t had your Crispin Hellion Glover fill for the day, here’s a video for his song “Clowny Clown Clown”, from his 1989 album “Big Problem Does Not Equal the Solution. The Solution = Let It Be.” You Tube

BLOG: So stupid, this cartoon comes right back around to being funny again. photo (thanks, Bludja)

Nerd humor, weird McDonald's poster, and NHL trash talking

BLOG: A little nerd humor to start your day right. Flickr (thanks, The Occassional Life and Words of........the Man With The Beard)

BLOG: I think this was a poster for a Steven King movie. Ads of the World (thanks, Pop Fantastic Sugary Lovely )

VIDEO: This is just some good, ol’ timey NHL trash talking. Google Video (thanks, Stacked)

Thai lady boys, Elliott Smith, and Lloyd Bentsen

BLOG: Who else can you talk to when the beautiful woman who just gave you a blowjob turns out to be a Thai lady boy? (Be sure to read to the end, as this story is hilarious.) Dominic in Southeast Asia

VIDEO: Elliott Smith covering John Lennon’s “Jealous Guy”. You Tube

VIDEO: In honor of the passing of former Senator and Treasury Secretary Lloyd Bentsen, here is his Putdown That Was Heard Around the World of Dan Quayle at the 1988 Vice Presidential debates. You Tube (longer, mediocre quality) or You Tube (shorter, better quality)

Bad tattoos, penile injury, and Shatner

BLOG: The gallery of bad tattoos. Bad Tattoos (thanks, It Comes in Pints?)

BLOG: Here’s the science behind why a man can break his penis. Waiter Rant

VIDEO: William Shatner blows $20,000 for a contestant on a ‘70s episode of “The $20,000 Pyramid” and then lets out his frustration. You Tube

Glenn Ford, Firefox, and music videos

BLOG: How cool was actor Glenn Ford (“Blackboard Jungle”, Jonathan Kent in 1979’s “Superman”)? This cool. It Comes in Pints?

BLOG: Do you use Fandango to buy movie tix? Well, next time, use your Firefox web browser instead of Internet Explorer. It’s cheaper, apparently. rangelife

VIDEO: Oh, the time you can waste watching ‘80s music videos. Milinkito (thanks, Slack LaLane)

henny youngman, shacking up, and fleet week

BLOG: Who doesn’t love a good Henny Youngman joke? The Blues and Then Some

BLOG: Stand your ground and demand that you be able to keep your cool-as-ass fantasy football trophies when you move in with your new live-in girlfriend. The Daily Dump

BLOG: Tips for girls on nailing a sailor during Fleet Week. Fauxy dot net

The Muppet Show, wrong luggage, Dean and Phish, and a disappointed Bowie

VIDEO: Rita Moreno performs a fan-fucking-tastic version of “Fever” with the Electric Mayhem Band on The Muppet Show. You Tube

BLOG: Probably not the kind of luggage you should take on an airplane. Or bus. Or train. Anywhere, really. bit-tech.net (thanks, Boing Boing)

BLOG: A picture of two Ben & Jerry’s flavors meeting in an airport. Slack LaLane

BLOG: David Bowie (and others) is very disappointed in you. Davidbowieisverydisappointedinyou.com (thanks, Uffish Thoughts)

70s toy commercials, bad beers, and Reno

VIDEO: You’ll want to buy these toys if you don’t already have them in your attic. You Tube (thanks, Boing Boing)

BLOG: The 10 beers you love to hate. (Be sure to read #4). Stuff (thanks, Paul Katcher)

BLOG: Reno: Vegas without the airs. rangelife

Horror art, odd baby name, and chick lit quiz

BLOG: Love art? Love horror movies? Love this. Worth 100 (thanks, Boing Boing)

BLOG: Reasons why an ex-Spice Girl might name her daughter “Bluebell Madonna.” Daily Dump

BLOG: Which classic female literary character are you? Quizilla (thanks, Dealing in Subterfuges

Subway riders, dangerous searches, and Strong Bad

BLOG: Color me 3 am. Graph Paper (thanks, Boing Boing)

BLOG: The 8 most dangerous search terms on the Internet (based on number of viruses that come with your results). ABC News: Science and Society (thanks, Fark)

VIDEO: Hold on to your fat, sweaty D&D playing head sets, tech support: Here’s Strong Bad with his latest email. Home Star Runner

Pudding, slacking, baseball hot dogs, and Chuck Norris on Chuck Norris

BLOG: I don’t remember The Cosby advertising these kind of pudding pops. I wish he had. I really, really wish he had. An Eternal Thought in the Mind of Godzilla

BLOG: Phew, reading Gawker all day sure can drain the life from you. The Company Bitch

BLOG: A Detroit Tigers game is great. A Detroit Tigers hot dog, however, is not so great. Fresh Pepper?

VIDEO: Chuck Norris on how tough a Chuck Norris Chuck Norris is. You Tube (thanks, Happyscrappy)

Mountain climbing, bitch-slapped, Nakedness, and Randy Johnson sucks

VIDEO: The stereotype about homosexuals being horrible mountain climbers is mostly true, albeit with one or two notable exceptions. You Tube (thanks, Eileen)

VIDEO: If you want to see two Czech politicians get into a slapping contest, go to this link. You Tube. BLOG: If you want to know just what the fuck they’re saying, go to this link. Deleted By Tomorrow

BLOG: Sometimes one of the million stories in the Naked City is a story about being nearly naked in the Naked City. Waiter Rant

BLOG: Randy Johnson can not only go to Hell, he can go there NOW. Paul Katcher

A cooler GWB, not for Pittsburghers, baby name

VIDEO: If this George W. Bush had been president, he would have been bigger than 10 Eisenhowers. You Tube

BLOG: It’s funny, but only if you’re not from Pittsburgh. Fresh Pepper?

BLOG: Worst baby name ever (besting even “Nevaeh”). New Baby News (thanks, rangelife)

Poker fair and balanced, POTUS's friends, and dark humor

BLOG: Bill O’Reilly’s tips on How to Play Poker. Cracked.com (thanks, Paul Katcher)

BLOG: The President likes to keep his friends close. Real close. Blogger.com (thanks, Slack LaLane)

BLOG: Your first and only definition of “gallows humor”. Aharef (thanks, Boing Boing)

Heroin, eye games, President Gore, and penis size

VIDEO: John Cale and Lou Reed performing “Heroin”. Need you know anymore? You Tube (thanks, Boing Boing)

BLOG: Stare at this and fuck up your eyes. Happyscrappy

VIDEO: And now a message from President Al Gore. Crooks and Liars

BLOG: If you’re like me, you find women talking frankly about penis size to be both helpful and incredibly hot. Dealing in Subterfuges

Guatemalans, Dear NSA, and broadway's next smash hit

BLOG: Guatemalans aren’t like you and me. El Guapo in DC

BLOG: Have a question and don’t know where to turn? Try writing Dear NSA. Dear NSA (thanks, Boing Boing)

BLOG: Bruce Campbell really is the Rex Harrison of his generation. Unhappy Medium

Robot Chicken, a vasectomy, Chuck Jones, and meta- metaness

BLOG: A vasectomy is a painful, very private affair: Unless of course you come from a family of cut-ups. Fresh Pepper

BLOG: For the little kid in everyone who’s still mezmorized by the work of animator Chuck Jones. ASIFA-Hollywood Animation Archive Project Blog

VIDEO: A short clip from “Robot Chicken” on Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim block. Slack LaLane

BLOG: A virtual reality video game that features its own video game, which became so popular that it turned into a real boy, er, video game. Collision Detection

Rick Sutcliffe drunk, dumb witnesses, romantics, and a mish-mash of stuff

VIDEO: ESPN announcer Rick Sutcliffe gets drunk and/or high. You Tube (thanks, Slack LaLane)

BLOG: Witnesses in court are the dumbest creatures on the face of the planet. Fresh Pepper

BLOG: Touché, Mssr. Pussycat, touché. The Company Bitch

BLOG: Lawyers, Basketball and O.J. The Daily Dump

Mr. T, the perfect man, and the role of a paralegal

VIDEO: Mr. T gonna pity the fool who don’t treat his mother right. You Tube (thanks, Music for Maniacs)

BLOG: Waiting for the perfect man, ladies? My Site Is Cool

BLOG: A good paralegal keeps his mouth shut and has given up on life. Anonymous Lawyer

Fecal parables, wireless, and hand noises

BLOG: A moral of fecal proportions. I Fling Poo

BLOG: Sometimes the wireless connection you are stealing is heaven. Sometimes, not. Three Toed Sloth

VIDEO: The stupidest thing you will ever see, even if you live to the age of a thousand. Google Video (thanks, Boing Boing)

Hot times in the city, the letter 'N', and bosomy women

BLOG: You ask yourself from time to time: "I wonder what it’s like to live and work in New York City?" And you tell yourself, "I'm sure it's not THAT exciting." fauxy dot net

BLOG: Someone has problems with his “N”’s. I Fling Poo

BLOG: Like women with huge knockers but don’t have the time to constantly troll myspace and youtube? Well, someone has finally done the work for you. Busty Web Shots (thanks, Paul Katcher)

Slogan contest, porky pig, and the stripper wins again

BLOG: Over at the Assimilated Negro, they’re having a slogan contest. The Assimilated Negro

BLOG: This picture can’t not make you laugh. all kinds of stuff

BLOG: Strippers 1, Bikers 0. Grace Undressed

Tom Cruise, vibrators, and douchebags

VIDEO: Tom Cruise is uncomfortable with black people. Best Week Ever (thanks, Rangelife)

BLOG: The line between razor and vibrator is awfully thin. The Name Game

BLOG: Ever wonder, “What’s she doing with that douchebag?” Hot Chicks with Douchebags (thanks, Happyscrappy)

Obnoxious cabbies, Star Trek, and Stephen Colbert

BLOG: Bad sex can start with a bad cab driver. Uffish

VIDEO: “As always, Scott bring da PowAH!” Slack LaLane

VIDEO: Missed Stephen Colbert’s performance at the White House Correspondents' Dinner? Google Video (thanks, Slack LaLane)

Religious zealots, Latino construction workers, and caricatures.

BLOG: The one thing we seem to have in common with the Muslim World is politicians who hide behind fake religious zeal. A Cynical Single Kuwaiti Woman

BLOG: Latino construction workers in DC are poets. Of a kind. El Guapo in DC

BLOG: 'Ren & Stimpy' creator John Kricfalusi isn’t just a great cartoonist, he’s also a pretty fair caricaturist. all kinds of stuff

Too much drinky-drink, cryin' babies, and New York's scariest borough

BLOG: He’s not hitting on you. He thinks you’re an alcoholic. The Company Bitch

BLOG: The Sumo tradition of making babies cry in public is alive and well. The Daily Dump

BLOG: Is Staten Island the right borough for you? Fresh Pepper

The no-win scenario, Irony, and a trailer for a horribly wonderful '60s film

BLOG: Star Trek fans take note: Reserving a table for dinner is a whole lot like the Kobayashi Maru test in ‘Wrath of Khan’. Waiter Rant

BLOG: Irony is rarely relaxing. Fresh Pepper

VIDEO: Get it? Seaman, Semen? They were so clever back in the ‘60s. And so sexually repressed when you think about it.PCL Link Dump (thanks, Boing Boing)